As I travel between cities on this whirlwind Scream tour, I often find time to peruse the interwebs on the Verizon tour bus (it has a funny picture of a phone doing a rude gesture drawn on the floor, the bathroom door handle is shaped like a phone, and also the bus driver dresses up like a phone). Over the last few months, I’ve noticed a few topics come up time and time again… Special enlargements, massive Nigerian inheritances, and to a lesser extent, the constant delays of the release of my excellent new album, Scream. So: to clear things up, I’ll try to explain things here, in my “official” “blog”!
I could try to lie to you darling people and say that it’s the record company being skanks, or that there’s a massive CD shortage, or that the printing machines - inexplicably - refuse to print my lyrics for the booklets, and make distressing hisses whenever we try. But I’m not going to fob you off like that… I wouldn’t dare lie to my adoring, confused fans out there. So here’s the real story.
My albums are, right now, being kept in a secret warehouse, guarded by two Alsations named “Preppy” and “Dog 43”. And every day, myself and Vicky sit down, and listen to another one of those CDs, to make sure that each one is as beautiful and magical as the one that came before it. We simply appreciate these records on a level that we don’t think the public at large is ready to… yet.
But come Septobuary 2012, you people are in for a real treat.
EDIT: Tim has just informed me that the CD shortage story was more plausible, so that’s what we’re going with. No CDs.
I could try to lie to you darling people and say that it’s the record company being skanks, or that there’s a massive CD shortage, or that the printing machines - inexplicably - refuse to print my lyrics for the booklets, and make distressing hisses whenever we try. But I’m not going to fob you off like that… I wouldn’t dare lie to my adoring, confused fans out there. So here’s the real story.
My albums are, right now, being kept in a secret warehouse, guarded by two Alsations named “Preppy” and “Dog 43”. And every day, myself and Vicky sit down, and listen to another one of those CDs, to make sure that each one is as beautiful and magical as the one that came before it. We simply appreciate these records on a level that we don’t think the public at large is ready to… yet.
But come Septobuary 2012, you people are in for a real treat.
EDIT: Tim has just informed me that the CD shortage story was more plausible, so that’s what we’re going with. No CDs.
Thanks for the explanation Chris, I needed to hear it straight from the horses mouth.
ReplyDelete(that's not a quip at your wife either)
Chris, you're my HERO!!!!
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